Elite Pets 41, 3G Capital 37
In a game that featured some complaints — both from players with regard to opponent flopping and from fans with regard to the broken livestream — Elite Pets won the first “Game of the Week” of the season by four points.

This was a close game throughout, with neither team being able to get a lead of more than 5-7 points.

Reigning MVP and ’Pets captain Joe Schnitzer stuffed the stat sheet, scoring 12 points, grabbing five rebounds, dishing five assists, nabbing four steals and yelling about the Scheffs flopping three times.

“He’s flopping,” Schnitzer complained to the ref about 3G co-captain Jason Scheff after a questionable foul call in the first half. “I know a flopper when I see one. I’m a big SpongeBob SquarePants fan so I know fish. Top 3% of all fans according to my trivia rating. I’m also a big flip-flop wearer. Havanas? Got ‘em. Reefs? Yup. Adidas? You betcha. I also love when movies that are supposed to be good end up being bad. Those are called flops, as you know. Anyways, bad call.”

Unfortunately for Schnitzer, the ref was so bored by his monologue he had already run down the court to set up the free-throw attempt by the time Schnitzer finished speaking.

But back to the game, 3G was led by Jason Scheff who scored 16 points, while fellow captain Jared Scheff added nine points. Matt Scheff added a pair of points of his own, while Scott Scheff added one “I’m the one person on the stream watching” text.

3G plays Novig next while the Pets play Sherwood.

Glasenglitter 47, Novig 33
Glasenglitter took a demanding lead from the tip in this one and never looked back.

Novig, playing without Jacob GA, Jake Lefkowitz and Sam Roth, started out the game in a zone defense trying to preserve legs. But Glase shot well throughout the night, led by rookie Max Stravitz, who finished with a game-high 20 points and eight rebounds.

Glasenglitter played a stout defense in the first half, holding Novig to just six points at the break. Despite giving up 28 points in the second half, Glasenglitter was able to cruise to the 14-point win.

It was also a welcome back party of sorts for Glasenglitter co-captain Sam Marlowe, who missed last season due to an ACL injury.

“It felt great to be knee — er — back,” Glasenglitter co-captain Sam Marlowe said. “I felt like as a team we played really smart and with our knees — er — heads. Also, good use of the word ‘stout’ earlier. Knee.”

Glasenglitter plays Newmark this week while Novig plays 3G Capital.

Sherwood 61, Vision Event Co. 42
Two seasons removed from an MVP award, Sherwood Lumber captain Harlan Reiss returned with an umph, as he led all scorers with 24 points to lead his team to a Week 1 victory.

“You know they say the difference between ‘try’ and ‘triumph’ is a little bit of ‘umph,’” Reiss said. “Also the letter ‘y.’”

This game started out close, as both teams began with 0 points.

But then Reiss began hitting threes and Mark Abramovitz and rookie Zach Corsun began grabbing rebounds, as Lumber outrebounded Vision 33-27.

The bright spot for Vision was Jonathan Granowitz, who finished with a team-high 16 points and nine rebounds.

“We’ll regroup during the bye week next week and go back to the fundamentals,” Vision captain and co-commissioner Alex Eisenstein said. “Like learning to spell the word ‘triumph,’ I guess.”

Sherwood, meanwhile, faces Elite Pets next.

Newmark Title Services 51, RDA 39
Newmark, who dis? That’s what many are saying after the Title Services crew defeated RDA by 11 points.

Ari Holzhauer scored 29 points and grabbed 13 rebounds, rookie Jacob Bass added nine points on three threes and Newmark moved to 1-0 on the season.

The game consisted of Holzhauer and RDA’s Amichai Feit trading buckets for much of the game, but a few too many misses from RDA as a whole led to a Newmark double-digit lead for most of the night.

RDA was without Noah Dunn and Jeremy Gross, but Josh Moskow started his campaign for most improved player strong, scoring 16 points and grabbing 10 boards.

Newmark, meanwhile, only had one person do their assigned stats for the evening.

“We’re not mad, we’re just disappointed,” the co-commissioners said in a statement.

Newmark faces Glasenglitter next while RDA takes on Brandgenuity.

Brandgenuity 61, DRG Talent 56
In a back-and-forth battle, Brandgenuity emerged victorious over DRG 61-56.

DRG, playing without captain Jonah Baron, Adir Berkowitz, Jeremy Steinman and Matthew Fiedler, took an early lead thanks to the scoring of reigning Rookie of the Year Zev Stravitz, who finished with a game-high 27 points.

“Rookie of the Year was so last year,” Stravitz said. “This season I’m going for the lesser-hyped but equally specific Second Year Player of the Year.”

Joining Stravitz in scoring and playmaking were teammates Nate Robinson and rookie Jake Hoffman, who both finished with double-doubles.

But ‘Genuity fought back, led by Josh Wohl (23 points, 7 rebounds, 3 assists), Elichai Foger (20, 5, 7) and Ari Sarna (15, 4, 1). Both teams went into the locker room at halftime with 28 points each.

Brandgenuity ultimately pulled away in the second half.

“What a game,” said Wohl during a Zoom interview after the game. “Sorry, what? Oh, I was just going to say — no you go ahead. Sorry, I think I was on mute. Can you hear me now?”

Brandgenuity faces RDA this week while DRG takes on Verstolo.