Game of the Week: Elite Pets 50, 3G Capital 40
With a big crowd on hand in person, and an even smaller crowd on the livestream, Elite Pets handed 3G Capital a defeat in the inaugural Game of the Week. The Pets got off to a hot start, riding the momentum from Noah Dunn, who notched a double-double with 18 points and 11 rebounds. Pets led at halftime 27-16.

The shorthanded 3G Capital squad, missing player-owner Ari Sarna, rookie Ghedalia Gold-Pastor, and second-year wing Matthew Warshay, put up a valiant comeback in the second half, but it wasn’t enough.

Asked after the game if he felt any nerves being on the livestream, Pets captain Jason Scheff shrugged it off. “I think my grandparents made up 90% of the viewers,” he said.

Co-Commissioner Elan Kane added: “Having even one grandparent watch the livestream this season, and three random Twitch users who stumbled upon it, has made all the hours of work worth it.”

Novig 74, DRG Talent 53
No Josh Wohl, no problem, Novig. That’s what many fans and analysts are saying after Novig’s win Sunday night, as Caleb Holzhauer, the sub for Wohl (who is missing the first half of the season), scored a league-high 28 points to lead Novig to 1-0. No one on Novig scored fewer than eight points, as the over easily hit.

The game was close throughout the first half, leaving some Chelsea Piers staffers to wonder whether the Game of the Week should have been assigned to this one. But like that little birdie from that one Yom Sport cheer, a second-half surge from Novig proved those CP staffers wrong. One CP staffer asked this reporter if they could have one of the league jerseys if DRG won, meaning the loss also left the staffer empty-handed. DRG was led by Emmett Stein and Nate Robinson, who scored 19 and 16 points, respectively.

Glasenglitter 48, Fresh Prints 44
With all eight players in attendance, Glasenglitter defeated a short-handed Fresh Prints team by the above score. The game was neck-in-neck throughout both halves, but Glasenglitter pulled away at the end thanks to some clutch free-throw shooting from Rick Atlas. 2023 Most Improved Player Jacob GA scored 15 points and grabbed seven rebounds, and rookie Zev Stravitz added 10 points and five rebounds for the Glitter Group.

Fresh Prints, meanwhile, was led by rookie Ari Holzhauer, who scored 19 points and grabbed 12 rebounds. Captain Max Geller attended the game but did not play due to injury, though many have theorized it was because he did not want to play against former teammate Jake Fischer.

“They gave me the Fresh Prints team because my Instagram handle is @freshprinceofgelair,” Geller said when asked why he did not play, seemingly avoiding the question to promote his Instagram.

Brandgenuity 53, Sherwood Lumber 46
Despite strong scoring performances from Jared Scheff (15 points), Alex Eisenstein and David Shepard (10 points each), Sherwood could not overcome the Brandgenuity Behemoth, losing 53-46.

I’ll be honest with you, this reporter did not get to watch much of this game. This is a plea for more game recap writers. If you’re reading this, SOS. I can only write so many of these.

Also, Simon Mendes had a double-double. Felt like that mensch deserved a mention. A Menschen, if you will.

RDA 67, Verstolo 65
In a game that was narrowly closer than three points, RDA defeated Verstolo by two points. RDA led for most of the game, thanks to a balanced scoring attack. Five players on RDA scored in double figures, including rookie Jonah Baron, who finished with a career-high 16 points.

But Verstolo kept it close throughout the evening, thanks to rookie Amichai Feit, who scored a game-high 26 points while grabbing eight rebounds.

“Should I use the pun about how he put up a great ‘Feit’ now so we can get it over with, or should I leave that for you for later in the season?” said Verstolo guard Yoni Goldstein.

As the game’s seconds ticked down, and with his team down by 1, Verstolo captain Joe Schnitzer hoisted up a shot that just bounced off the rim. After Baron hit a free-throw on the ensuing possession, a last-second heave by Verstolo from half-court was no good, and RDA came away with the victory.